No Room For Doubt

Single or not. Single or not. I don’t know where to start. Try not to judge me based on this entry.

I miss the single life. Not having to worry about how your actions are affecting another person. Feeling content with sleeping alone. One less person who has the ability to cause you hurt and disappointment.

I took him back and I feel…not the greatest about that decision. I haven’t forgiven him for walking out. I’m worried because he walked out so easily that I don’t know when it’ll happen again because, let’s face it, if it’s that simple it’ll probably happen again. I feel as though he’s put less effort in since I took him back and now I’m questioning my position in this relationship.

What am I waiting for that will let me know which step to take with him next? Essentially it has to be a step forward because I’ve already got one foot out. Do I accept being content and not wildly happy with my man?

The song I can’t shake out of my head, and which causes me to reflect on my “now”, is by Lace - I Want a Man.

Singledom doesn’t scare me. In fact I embrace it. If and when the man who I can’t live without comes along I’ll happily take on life with him.

I know what to do, I just don’t want to and you can’t make me until I’m ready.